Many friends of mine think they’re great at reading body language, knowing what people think and presuming to know the future of business, politics and sport. It’s a sport to be this confident. Most think they’re good at golf and poker, too. But, in most negotiations, it’s not just what you say but how you say it that can influence others the most.
In job interviews, very few people want to talk about the tells, or reveals, that interviewees can and should make to create value in the hiring manager’s mind. Often, they will love you for it, and it may become a reason to hire you even beyond the person who is more qualified on paper. The general rule to hiring in my book is that it’s not the person who is most qualified who always gets hired — it’s the person who knows how to get hired. So, get hired by considering using these tells intentionally in an interview.
No recruiter or hiring manager will intentionally ask illegal questions to find out more about you, but don’t doubt for a moment that they want to know more than the stats on your resume. The real secret is that they want to know what you are really like in person, during a conflict and in a crisis. They want to know if your personal life will affect your job and if you have any kind of issues personally that will get in the way of doing your job.
Here are some questions that they won’t probably ask (but often would love to know):
Are you married, single, divorced, separated or engaged?
What do you like to do in your spare time?
Are there any issues that might mess you up at work, problems with your children or personal concerns?